


All Stars Burn Out

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, Song fic, a random fic in honor of season 2, this is that one angsty fic that you never needed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-04
Updated: 2015-10-04
Packaged: 2018-04-24 19:21:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4932190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Iwaizumi liked to think that Oikawa was like the sun. Always bright, always smiling, always there.<br/>Maybe that’s why he decided to become friends with him those many years ago.<br/>Maybe that's why, when he saw Oikawa sitting there, far away from the playground where the other kids were playing, he decided to walk up to him.<br/>Maybe that’s why Iwaizumi decided to plop down next to Oikawa and share his strawberry flavored Pocky sticks with him.<br/>Maybe that why he stuck with Oikawa.<br/>Maybe that’s why he went to Oikawa’s house for a sleepover/stargazing session every Saturday.<br/>Maybe that’s why he joined the volleyball club with Oikawa in junior high.<br/>Maybe that’s why he stuck with Oikawa.<br/>Because he was the sun.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All Stars Burn Out

**Author's Note:**

> aaah i suck at writing angst i'm sorry orz  
> this was beta-ed by my friend sarah! check out her tumblr [here](http://jarofdoodles.tumblr.com/)  
> ALSO HAIKYUU SEASON TWO CAN I GET A HELL YEAH

Iwaizumi liked to think that Oikawa was like the sun. Always bright, always smiling, always there.

Maybe that’s why he decided to become friends with him those many years ago.

Maybe that's why, when he saw Oikawa sitting there, far away from the playground where the other kids were playing, he decided to walk up to him.

Maybe that’s why Iwaizumi decided to plop down next to Oikawa and share his strawberry flavored Pocky sticks with him.

Maybe that why he stuck with Oikawa.

Maybe that’s why he went to Oikawa’s house for a sleepover/stargazing session every Saturday.

Maybe that’s why he joined the volleyball club with Oikawa in junior high.

Maybe that’s why he stuck with Oikawa.

Because he was the sun.

\--

_You’ve got to help me up_

_You’ve got to drag me off the ground_

Once high school started, Oikawa started to overwork himself. He stayed longer at the gym. He was always exhausted. His grades got lower, because all he could think about was volleyball. All he wanted to was stay in the gym for hours, practicing and practicing and practicing. Iwaizumi tried his best to slow down Oikawa, to make him come home earlier, and it worked for a while. Oikawa started getting better. He would eat more. He pulled up his grades. He practiced less and made sure he was taking care of his body. Because when he did, Iwa-chan become less gruff. Iwaizumi smiled more. He didn’t threaten Oikawa as much (which was still a lot, but Oikawa took what he could get). Oikawa liked that. He liked it when his Iwa-chan would grin, high-five everyone, buy them all ice-cream.

Oikawa liked it when Iwa-chan was _happy_.

\--

_One minute I held the key_

_Next the walls were closed on me_

_And I discovered that my castles stand_

_Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand_

Then Nationals rolled around.

Aoba Johsai had made it into the finals. They were up against Shiratorizawa Academy. Aoba Johsai had trained hard, had practiced harder, had perfected their skills to the max. They were sure it was enough.

It was 24 to 24. Two more points and Aoba Johsai would win. They could practically taste the victory.

Oikawa’s serve was a thing of perfection.

The ball flew out of his coarse hands and found Iwaizumi, who jumped, smacking the ball as hard as he could over the net.

The timing was perfect.

Aoba Johsai was sure that their skills were enough.

Everyone was shocked when they found out it wasn’t.

Wakatoshi Ushijima had hit the ball back over, much to the surprise of Aoba Johsai. Oikawa mentally smacked himself, telling himself that he need to be better. He would do better next time. Much better. Issei Matsukawa managed to receive the ball, but it became a chance ball for the other team.

Shiratorizawa hit the ball back.

 _Aoba Johsai failed to receive it_.

Aoba Johsai tried to do better. Their next serve was a bit off, but only by the _tiniest bit_.

And Shiratorizawa managed to slip through and win, but only by the _tiniest bit_.

 

Oikawa came to hate tiniest bits.

\--

_Though it’s like_

_There is no hope in sight_

_I’ll be your satellite to guide you home_

_You are not alone_

There were lots of tears that night. There were lots of tissues and sobbing and wet t-shirts, soaked from Iwaizumi’s and Oikawa’s tears, snot, and disappointment.

Oikawa stayed in Iwa-chan’s bed that night, clutching onto him like Iwaizumi would disappear, just like their victory.

When Oikawa left to go to his own house the next morning, his eyes were red and puffy and his voice was hoarse.

Oikawa didn’t leave his room for 4 days.

When he did, he completely threw himself back into volleyball.

He trained harder. He improved more and more. He didn’t improve by the tiniest bit. Oikawa improved greatly.

But little did he know what came with the price of improving greatly.

 

Iwaizumi was gone on a vacation for three weeks. When he came back, Iwaizumi took one look at Oikawa and knew he was overworking himself again. Whenever he asked Oikawa how much he was eating, how long he was practicing, how he was feeling, he would make some comment about how Iwa-chan was basically his mother and change the subject. Iwaizumi, seeing how his best friend clearly didn’t want to talk about it, didn’t broach the subject further. Oikawa looked healthy enough. He was smiling more, which was good. And they were going to the same college, which was good. They were both on the volleyball team, which was good.

Things were good.

Until things came crashing down.  

Iwaizumi knew that neither of them had gotten over their defeat at Nationals in high school, but he didn’t know Oikawa was _that_ torn about it.

Speaking of things being torn, Oikawa tore his knee overworking himself.

\--

_Work it harder, make it better_

_Do it faster, makes us stronger_

Oikawa had been practicing in the gym, long after everyone had left, as always. He had lots of homework to do, but all he could think about was practicing until his heart was thumping against his chest so hard his body shook. He jumped higher and smacked the ball harder and kept at it until his hands were numb and stinging and he felt the most terrible pain in his knee mid-jump.

He fell to the ground, his body hitting the hard wooden floors, his body aching, his muscles sore and his knee on fire.

Oikawa crawled to his bag and found his phone.

“H-help, Iwa-ch-han.”

\--

 

_I would have stayed up with you all night_

_Had I know how to save a life_

Iwaizumi had never ran that fast. He just dropped everything and ran to Oikawa’s side. He didn’t even bring a jacket, but he barely noticed the biting cold as he sprinted to the gym.

 

He never wanted to see Oikawa like that again. He was crumpled on the ground, clutching his knee, tears running down his face, shirt soaked in sweat and exhaustion.

Everything after that was a blur. 911, red and white flashing lights, hospital, nurses, doctors, crying parents, crying Oikawa, crying Iwaizumi.

\--

_But I'm only human_

_And I bleed when I fall down_

_I'm only human_

_And I crash and I break down_

“No.” Were the first words that came out of Oikawa’s mouth when he heard that there was a high chance that he would never play volleyball again.

Iwaizumi was shocked when he heard that Oikawa may never be able to play volleyball again. He had done some research on his own and learned that a torn knee ligament was nothing fatal if treated quickly and ended in a full recovery. “Wait, I thought you said that a torn knee ligament wasn’t that bad?” Iwaizumi asked the doctor. “Well, yes, but since Oikawa has been overworking his knee, which was fragile in the first place, his knee ligament was in a terrible condition. Now that he’s torn it, it’s condition went from bad to worse.” The doctor explained, a sad look in his eyes.

 

Guilt. That’s what Iwaizumi felt. He should’ve been there. He’s been helping and taking care of Oikawa for years. He should’ve been there. He was always there for Oikawa, whether it was a late night stargazing session or just to watch alien movies. He was always when there Oikawa became obsessed with improving and he got that glint in his eyes. When he would stay in the gym for hours. When he wouldn’t eat. When Oikawa wasn’t Oikawa.

 

Oikawa had always like the saying “Reach for the stars.”. He would try and try to reach the stars, to become the perfect volleyball player. For his serves and his tosses and his sets to be perfect. Yet every time Oikawa reached just a bit too far, when he got too close, Iwaizumi would be there to bring him down.

Because humans can’t survive without oxygen.

Where the stars are, there is no oxygen.

And Oikawa, a human, could not survive like this, always reaching too far, not knowing where the boundaries are, oblivious to his health and what he was doing to Iwaizumi.

 

Iwaizumi had always liked the saying “Know where your boundaries are.”. He believed that humans should know where their boundaries were and when to stop. He believed that humans were not perfect, and when they tried too hard to become this perfect being, they get more imperfect. Humans can never be perfect. Yet they continue to try to disprove that.

Take Oikawa, for example. The more he strives to become perfect, his body becomes less perfect. It gets tired, and when overworked, it can eventually break.

And unfortunately, broken things are never considered perfect.

\--

_Numbing the senses,_

_I feel you slipping away_

Oikawa was the sun to Iwaizumi. Oikawa was the star of the court. But like all stars, they burn out.

Oikawa was no exception.

He smiled less. And when he did, they were all fake. His eye’s slowly lost their shine. He became more and more quiet. He didn’t make snarky comments. He just sat in his hospital bed, not wanting to do anything. His eyes became clouded and he showed no emotion.

Iwaizumi visited him everyday. He gave him the run down on their college team, how they were doing, even though he knew Oikawa didn’t care.

All stars burn out.

And Oikawa was no exception.

Worst of all, Iwaizumi didn’t how to stop Oikawa from burning out. How to stop Oikawa from crumbling. How to stop Oikawa from shattering.

The one thing Iwaizumi did know was that he would and could never never stop loving Oikawa. He loved him so much he felt like his heart would break.

Because he did. He loved his little Assikawa. He loved how Oikawa would pour his heart and soul into volleyball. He loved how Oikawa would have a smile to give everyone, and he loved how Oikawa would always smile genuinely at him. He loved how Oikawa’s eyes would lit up as he excessively explained why aliens really existed.

He loved everything about Oikawa Tooru, from his soft hair to his glittering eyes and his warm hands.

\--

_Fighting to hold on,_

_Clinging to just one more day_

Oikawa had fallen asleep, so Iwaizumi got up from his chair to leave. He was about to turn off the lights when small voice pierced the silence.

“D-don’t leave me, Iwa-ch-chan.”

“I would never leave you, Oikawa.”

“Come here.”

Iwaizumi sat back down in his chair and took Oikawa small and fragile hand in his. “Have you been crying?” Iwaizumi asked, noticing how Oikawa’s shoulders was shaking.

Oikawa turned around to face Iwaizumi. His eyes were red and he was hiccuping. “Don’t leave me.”

“I would never.” Iwaizumi replied easily, caressing his best friends hand. “Even if can’t play volleyball anymore? Even if I managed to hurt myself by overworking, the one thing that you have told me constantly not to do?”

“I would never leave you.” Iwaizumi replied firmly, still clutching Oikawa’s hand.

That’s when Oikawa broke down, shoulders shaking, rivers of tears streaming down his red face, squeezing Iwaizumi’s hand. “I hate it! I hate myself! I managed to take away the one thing that I loved most!”

“Oikawa. Stop. Stop this. Okay? Just keep fighting, okay? The doctor didn’t say you couldn’t play volleyball anymore, he just said that there is a chance you can’t. There’s a difference, alright?” Iwaizumi said, tracing calming circles on Oikawa’s hand.

“He said there was a high chance! A high chance!” Oikawa shouted, ripping his hand away.

It was silent for a moment.

“Don’t look at me like that.” He whispered.

“What?” Iwaizumi asked, confused.

“Don’t look at me with you eyes of pity. I don’t want your pity. I’m just going to sit here in this bed, with my pathetic knee and die.”

“The doctor never said that you’re going to die. Stop being ridiculous, Shittykawa.”

“The doctor did say that I couldn’t play volleyball.”

“Well, I’m not going to let you die. I’m going to make sure you get better, and I’m going to make you smile again. Not your trashy fake ones, but real smiles. I’m going to make you do your shitty peace signs again too. And there’s nothing you can do to stop me.” Iwaizumi stated, taking Oikawa’s hand again and forming it into a peace sign. He then lifted it up to his face and adopted a high pitched voice. “Iwa-chan! Come over here! I need you to take a selfie of me!”

Oikawa laughed.

“See? I told you I would make you smile again.”

\--

_I like to think that that you were like the sun. Always bright, always smiling, always there._

_You were the star of the court. The one to bring everyone together. The one to bring the team to victory. The one that was able to make anyone smile, no matter how terrible they felt._

_When you were outshined, you would always try to become better._

_You may not be the brightest star out there, but you are the brightest in my mind._

_And maybe that’s enough._

_Maybe you don’t have to be the best._

_Maybe you don’t have to be the greatest._

_Because to so many people, you already are._

_In every single volleyball club we joined, you were always the best, the brightest, the greatest player there. Everyone thought you were the best volleyball player ever._

_All stars burn out._

_And you are no exception._

_But you will always be the best, the brightest, the greater star in my mind._

_And maybe that’s enough._

_So relax. Let your knee rest up._

_I’ll see you on the court, Grand King._

Iwaizumi placed the letter on Oikawa’s bedside table along with a box of strawberry flavored Pocky.

_I’ll see you on the court, Grand King._

**Author's Note:**

> songs used in this fic (in the order they appear):  
> Silver Wings - Go Periscope  
> Viva la Vida - Coldplay  
> Satellite - Tritonal (feat. Jonathan Mendelsohn)  
> Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger - Daft Punk  
> How to Save a Life - The Fray  
> Human - Christina Perri  
> Still Here - Digital Daggers  
> [my tumblr](qiyoan.tumblr.com) scream to me about haikyuu!! season 2


End file.
